Everyone goes through difficult times and has baggage to deal with but when push comes to shove, when the rubber meets the road, when the chips are down, do we scream “why me?’. Let’s make one thing clear. Life is a continuous succession of both small and large problems. They never end. No sooner do you get control of one situation and another hits you.
My own life is no different. One day, I had both parents and in less than an hour, we got news that our father is dead.
As if that was not enough, bills started piling up and my family had no money to feed or even pay school fees.
“Why me?” was a question I kept asking? At the time, I didn’t see any good in the adversity.
But in the last three years, my view of adversity has changed. I no longer resist what comes my way. This is because; I’ve realized that life isn’t supposed to be easy. Our challenges will make us stronger.
You see, the challenges I faced and the pain was the force that shaped me into who I am right now. I have learned that without difficulty, without adversity, there is no growth. No progress.
The death of my biological parents made me stronger. I became an adult at 16. I learned to be a mother while I was still a child. At the time, my adversity seemed like an obstacle between my dreams and me.
I had to wait 6 years after high school to get into University and at didn’t make sense then. But now, it’s more like the adversity pointed me to the stepping-stones along the stream of my journey. Even though I had to wear people’s used clothes, work as a cleaner for as little as 200 per day. I kept my thoughts on where I was going, not on where I’ve been or where I was.
I learned 5 things in the last 13 years of my life losing my parents, being a “parent” to my siblings, living on the street etc. As Eckhart Tolle said, “Whenever something negative happens to you, there is a deep lesson concealed within it.”
Lesson 1: Know and accept that adversity is inevitable in life. Resolve in advance that you will meet difficulties, and then, no matter what happen, don’t give in to it. SLAY!
Lesson 2: Great things take time. I know this sound crazy but it is true. Think, a bean or an oak tree. It’s your choice.
Lesson 3: You are not alone. Be careful to think that you’re the only one facing challenges because, in the midst of hard times, it’s easy to look around and see everyone doing just fine. You want the truth; they’re not. We’re all struggling in our own way.
Lesson 4: Trust your journey and the detours, you’ll learn a lot of things while at it. I always say, “so many times we face difficulties that alter the itinerary of our lives, only to find the detour was actually God’s path”.
Lesson 5: There is always, always, always something to be thankful for regardless of the things that are going completely wrong. Be thankful for all the small things in your life, because when you put them all together you will see just how significant they are.
Here’s the Bottom Line. “Sometimes even to live is an act of courage.” – Seneca. Life is meant to be difficult. Life is designed to challenge you. But that doesn’t automatically make it a problem. The problem is thinking that life should be a smooth ride. The more you can accept what comes your way, the more you can flow with life, and turn difficulty into
Life is designed to challenge you. But that doesn’t automatically make it a problem. The problem is thinking that life should be a smooth ride. The more you can accept what comes your way, the more you can flow with life, and turn difficulty into opportunities.
Here’s a quote from someone I admire; Hunter S. Thompson. “Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!”.